I think I may have finally learned my lesson. No goal list for 2010. I have found that there's a wide gulf between what I plan to do and what I actually do. Mostly this is because of left-field surprises like thyroid cancer because otherwise I am pretty methodical. I have a vague notion of things I'd like to work on for the year: more drawing, more guitar, etc. It's true that creative types need scheduling. And I have that. I plan to start Illustration Saturdays. Basically, I'll take an unillustrated article or listen to a 'This American Life' story and try to capture it visually. I expect no small amount of frustration, but it will be a great learning experience. I also want to re-establish Watercolour Sundays. Obviously, things will have to be flexible because there's another cancer surgery and treatment on the horizon. There's also an idea for a graphic novel kicking around that used to be an idea for a novel. We'll see where that goes. I want to go at it playfully. If it isn't fun, what's the point? In needlework news, I am going to embark on the adventure that is embroidery (this will likely become part of illustrations).
It's really weird how my dreams of illustrating just flew out of my head in October after I heard that there was still a tumour. After my surgery last March, it felt like my right brain went into hyperdrive. Not sure how or why, but drawing and other visual activities took over my brain. I reconnected with a part of myself that I had totally forgotten about. My verbal skills have slowly been catching up. That is weird to say. I mean, I do French to English abstracts and translations full-time. Highly verbal. I've written a novel. Somehow, after the surgery, I lost the concentration for that. Or, rather, needed every ounce for my job and didn't have anything to spare after the work day. Sitting almost entirely still and drawing, however, I have total concentration. Perhaps not surprisingly, the drawing stopped with the ultrasound and biopsy and doctor's visits in October. Being mostly ignored by my cancer team did not do much to boost my confidence or morale. What brought me the most peace left my mind entirely and I was sucked up into doubt and fear and confusion. One day this last week, I went onto my Amazon.co.uk Wish List. I saw illustration and comics books on it and something washed over me. Trust? Faith? Not sure. I had been going in a million directions, but something clicked and I had direction. I am trusting this direction. Where am I going? Not sure. It's like going to a new city, walking around with a bad map and trying to find a landmark. At some point, you see a street and something in you says, 'This will get you to the place you've been looking for.' You turn onto the street with the knowledge that even if it doesn't take you where you need to go, you can always retrace your steps.
In all the planning, I lose the doing. I hope that 2010 will be year of focus, of input, of output, of connection, of discovery, of confidence. Gonna make my own luck this year.
My step-father-in-law took some pictures yesterday of the freezing fog. It was really beautiful. I yoinked these from his facebook page, hopefully he'll post more because it was really spectacular out yesterday. There was a pretty neat looking frozen spider web, I hope he got one of that.
Looks like our big snowstorm today is going to be a bust. It will only be rain for the next few days. Hooray!
The lovely Dave bought me a 75-300mm lens for my camera and yesterday we went for an xmas walk on the beach. I cannot wait until spring when the light is better...prepare for lots of photo spam.
My new favorite t-shirt.
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gather round, children
The beer is DadH's, a thoughtful gift from Brother Ray. I thought it went well with my MSU snuggie. The Girls thought the remote would be a nice touch for the photo.
Now the Girls are trying to ride the unicycle from MomH. They should pick a different spot instead of next to the kitchen table and in front of the stairs to the basement.
I'll upload a photo of head wounds later. Ha ha!
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I waited until most of you have gone to sleep to whip out some of my favorite Christmas music. Who would've thought that an atheist like myself would prefer Christmas music about Jesus?
To all of my Vox neighbors, friends and family I hope you find a bit of peace and even some joy this holiday weekend. It's been a tough year for a lot of us and I know many of us won't be spending the holidays with those we love the most. My heart especially goes out to those of you who have lost close friends and family in the past year. Love to you all, Val
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